Genius Fan

This post is confessional. It’s like a diary entry, rather than a post about the Eighteenth century, but since it’s about the haggis and Burns Night (Rabbie Burns being an Eighteenth century Scottish character) I felt I could, nay, should, reveal how I ate my haggis on Burns Night 2026. All this in respect to his barnstorming poem To a Haggis!

To a Haggis (full poem at the Scottish Poetry Library)

Fair fa’ your honest sonsie face,
Great chieftain o’ the puddin’-race!
Aboon them a’ ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy o’ a grace
As lang’s my arm.

To a Haggis, Burns’ poem

Burns’ poem To A Haggis is a brilliant composition. It tells a story of admiration for the haggis, the great chieftain of the puddin’ race. You’ll probably need to read it in the translation. And you should say it out loud. Oh boy should you say it out loud! It’s great fun to summon up your most Scottish accent, go over the top, turn the dial to 11, and so on. Belt out the first verse of the poem you’ll feel like you’re a time traveller – whizzing back through the decades to a Scots dining room of the Georgian era.

But I didn’t do that this Burns Night. I betrayed Burns’ poetic effort. I know the traditional way to cook a haggis is to boil it in a sheep’s stomach. We all know that. Don’t we? (Do we?) But it takes so long to cook when you do that: I had a 908g Simon Howie Butcher Chieftain Haggis, in an artificial ‘plastic’ sheep’s stomach) and it offered instructions on three ways to cook:

• Boil: The whole haggis to simmer for 75mins
• Oven: The whole haggis in a preheated oven for 90mins
• Microwave: Haggis removed from casing and chopped up: 7mins in total

I haven’t boiled a haggis in more than 20 years. Actually, I haven’t eaten haggis according to tradition, with neeps (mashed swede or turnip) and tatties (mashed potatoes), for more than a decade. I mostly eat haggis from the fish and chip shop, and that’s been deep fried (it’s great), but that doesn’t come with neeps and tatties.

Cooking my haggis

But on Burns night 2026, I cooked my own haggis, and I microwaved it. And didn’t bother with neeps and tatties. That’s pure laziness (and not investing time in prepping my food). I see now I must take a shot at sourcing a traditional haggis. Maybe sampling some of the recipes from my Eighteenth century cookery books:

• Food and Cooking in 18th Century Britain: History and Recipes, Jennifer Stead (1985)
• Much EntertainmentL A Visual and Culinary Record of Johnson and Boswell’s Tour of Scotland in 1773, Virginia Maclean (1973)

My suggestion for a haggis-eating routine

Bottom line, bottom rung on the ladder: Read Burns’ To a Haggis
Next rung: Buy, cook and enjoy haggis.
Next rung up: Prep neeps and tatties for the same meal
Next rung up on the ladder: Buy a haggis with a real sheep’s stomach
Next rung: Boil it